What movie are you starring in?

"I don't come from data. I come from stories."
- Jane Goodall

A few things this week collided to expand my thinking on positioning, branding and what I'm uniquely qualified to offer. It would be amazing to connect the dots looking forward, but sometimes we connect the dots in reverse. Only when we can read the map we created. In the spirit of transparency, I have been in the midst of redefining my career and work for some time. I've been wrestling with uncertainty. Doubt. Questioning direction and focus. Really, it's been top of mind for the past two years!

Pull not push

This week I was listening to a podcast with Chip Conley talking about his new book Wisdom at Work about the value mid to late career people offer. The soft skills that can only be earned through experience. Venture Capitalists expect 20-something CEOs to have these skills and they don't. Then they wonder why they have trouble building and managing healthy teams. It makes a huge difference. One of the key predictors of a business failure is a CEO who isn't coachable or who won't check their ego at the door.

Back to my story. Chip mentioned the 52 year old who's lost their job and facing a crossroads. They still have a lot of life left in them and aren't ready for retirement. But face a daunting task of figuring out what's next after the path they've been on vanished in an instant. I'm 52 and found myself there this spring and thus this hit home. It's me! And I bet it's some of you too. Or someone you know.

I thought long and hard two years ago about creating a future with location independent work. Of helping start-ups build strong cultures and brands. Of also building a thriving online photo gallery.

And then had the opportunity to experience a large professional services firm from the inside. Until I didn't.

This moment, courtesy of 2020, created the opportunity to create unencumbered.

I had a clean slate to define the path forward. That is both a gift and a curse as it requires choices. Resilience. Execution. A growth mindset. We are usually the biggest obstacles to success.

I've created no less than three iterations of my consulting website since May. Different positioning, offering and design. Yet it still doesn't demonstrate what I'm uniquely qualified to offer. What makes me so different. So special. Why should a start up enlist me to help with their marketing?

It's about trust and relationships for sure. But why me? Why not me? Yet, it's not obvious on the surface. My website doesn't create a magnetic pull or spark emotions that make people want to share and talk. And that's many other consultants and companies too. And most resumes. We all look pretty much the same. How about you?

Whether you're seeking a job or self employment, your task is similar: Identify what you are uniquely qualified to offer. If you don't, you'll find yourself pushing boulders up hill. Think about how you can create a situation that is more 'pull' than 'push'. It's far easier to win with pull. I know how hard it is to push. So much clutter and noise to get through.

Derek Sivers started CD Baby because people kept asking him to list their CD after he listed his own. One led to another which led to another which led to forming the company. He's said that everything he's done has been because of a pull. He was asked to create the thing. In order to get into a pull position, you've got to stand for something. You've got to be remarkable. Not like everyone else. You've got to take the time to know what you stand for and why. Purpose is everything. Or shall I say, purpose relevant to those you serve is everything. And everything matters.

Don't shortcut the details. Don't shortcut your thinking. Go slow to go fast.

Your life in the movies

At the DO Lectures they talk about the Two Films of your life. And which do you want to live? The first is the safe film. Predictable and with little risk. The other is where you stretch and grow and do. At the ‘DO’ the safe path is not the chosen path. Most of us live the safe life. And miss out on what's possible because it's easier to let life happen than to take control and have to be accountable for our choices. I know that I've spent more time making the first film when I want to make the second. Yet I'm struggling with the script. It's too safe. That's why my website is safe. It's solid. But very, very safe. Making the second film makes you risk failure. Embarrassment. It might not work. You'll be held accountable because you are directing rather than being directed. But being accountable is where the magic lies.


I learned a new trick to writing the script

Branding luminary Debbie Millman talks about the 10 year plan for your life that she has her Masters in Branding students create. It came from the legendary designer Milton Glaser who had his student create a 5 year plan. What you do is imagine your life 5 or 10 years in the future assuming everything works out as you envisioned. Pick a day to write about. Where are you living, who are you with and what are you doing? What does your home look and feel like? What kind of plants are in your garden. What kind of sheets on your bed? What kind of food do you enjoy?

Go deep. Dream big. Don't edit.

Some people do this in a page. Others have several pages. Whatever the length, review it every year. You don't have to share it with anyone. Make sure you don't play small.

What both Debbie and Milton found was that for many students what they wrote became their life. It won't happen if you don't refer to it regularly though. It sounds fantastical, yet there is data behind this. It creates a tangible picture in our mind that translates into focused action. I have it done it yet but am going to create a three year plan for when I'm 55.

While at the DO Lectures in 2016 I created a vision board. Looking back, much of what I put on there has happened. Not to the level I hoped (YET). It's still very, very safe. But I'm still on the path I envisioned. I had a dream of location independent work in a few years. I am doing that now. It’s time for me to update my vision board with this exercise. Yes, even at 50 you can and should do this. Get intentional.


You are not your past

If that's not enough to kick you off the couch, perhaps the story of Khalilah Olukunola will. She grew up in Brooklyn with two middle-class parents who worked on Wall Street. When she was 11, her father started drinking and using drugs.

Naturally outspoken, she pushed back and he made her sleep outside. Tired of sleeping on trains or in a shed she landed at family in upstate New York to have a bed. There, she joined them in selling drugs. She was good at it.

And then found herself in prison for 5 years. When she was out, she got a job at Sprint where she met her husband. He believed in her and told her to believe in herself. Which she did. She later started a successful event business that catered to celebrities. Then started talking to groups about change. It became her mission. Sold the event business to live her mission.

She found herself in a vaunted world and worried about sharing her past. Then she met entrepreneur George Taylor who founded TRU Colors, which hires gang members, and shared her story. TRU stands for trust, responsibility and unity.

He gave her a week's trial on a project. And then a month. And another month. She kept proving herself and joined his company full time. She's now the EVP of HR and leads their mission of helping gang members find their purpose.

TRU Colors doesn't make them leave their gangs. It's showing gang members there's another path. It's proven how creating purpose can create massive change in communities and people. And has significantly reduced gun violence in Wilmington North Carolina.

This is how you overcome adversity to hit your goals. This is how you show up and stand for something.


A big dose of positive human energy

Last week I talked about Patagonia as a brand that stood for something that mattered. Chipper Bro Bell is an embodiment of the brand. For 25 years he was the receptionist. But don't use the common stereotype for the roll. He got to see all aspects of the company and was the first face guests saw when visiting the headquarters. He's also a frisbee freestyler champion sponsored for 11 years by Anheuser Busch. And runs a surfing school that's helped blind kids surf.

He has a smile from ear to ear. You can feel his warmth. As someone who is admittedly tightly wound, I admire his ability to chill. He inspires me to be a better human. Imagine if there were more Chipper Bro Bells. Listen to his talk at Do Lectures USA and find out for yourself. You'll find it hard not to smile.

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jamie@example.com
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